1
00:00:00,801 --> 00:00:03,003
[rock music]

2
00:00:03,537 --> 00:00:07,375
Max, over here
in our white trash window.

3
00:00:07,408 --> 00:00:09,677
I need help with the shower.

4
00:00:09,710 --> 00:00:10,811
[sighs]
All right, Chestnut,

5
00:00:10,844 --> 00:00:12,246
we're heading to work soon.

6
00:00:12,280 --> 00:00:14,382
You know the rules:
No R-rated movies,

7
00:00:14,415 --> 00:00:18,286
no sugary snacks, and I want you
standing up asleep by 11:00.

8
00:00:19,553 --> 00:00:20,654
[grunting]

9
00:00:20,688 --> 00:00:22,456
What's the problem?

10
00:00:22,490 --> 00:00:24,092
I can't turn it on.

11
00:00:24,125 --> 00:00:25,259
Well, drop your towel
and tell it

12
00:00:25,293 --> 00:00:26,427
it's got a big nozzle.

13
00:00:26,460 --> 00:00:27,395
[chuckles]

14
00:00:27,428 --> 00:00:29,163
Did you even do
a rat check?

15
00:00:29,197 --> 00:00:31,065
Yes. Theodore is gone.

16
00:00:31,099 --> 00:00:34,135
Even he got a better apartment.

17
00:00:34,168 --> 00:00:37,671
Max, remind me, what separates
us from homeless people?

18
00:00:37,705 --> 00:00:39,473
We're not as tan.

19
00:00:39,507 --> 00:00:42,210
Oh, yeah, we have
a sometimes functioning shower

20
00:00:42,243 --> 00:00:43,544
and that sweet shower curtain.

21
00:00:43,577 --> 00:00:46,647
Hmm, which was gifted to us
by a homeless person

22
00:00:46,680 --> 00:00:49,783
who no longer needed his cape.

23
00:00:49,817 --> 00:00:51,452
All right.

24
00:00:51,485 --> 00:00:54,322
That should do it.

25
00:00:55,723 --> 00:00:58,459
[pipes groaning]

26
00:00:58,492 --> 00:00:59,760
[groaning stops]

27
00:00:59,793 --> 00:01:02,230
Hey, why'd the sound stop?

28
00:01:03,531 --> 00:01:05,099
That's weird.

29
00:01:09,137 --> 00:01:12,106
[screaming]

30
00:01:12,140 --> 00:01:13,307
Ah!

31
00:01:14,308 --> 00:01:16,477
- All right. All right.
- Ugh.

32
00:01:16,510 --> 00:01:18,479
Ugh.
[groans]

33
00:01:20,514 --> 00:01:22,183
[gasps]

34
00:01:22,216 --> 00:01:24,785
Well, I got it turned on.

35
00:01:24,818 --> 00:01:28,156
[horse snorts]

36
00:01:28,189 --> 00:01:29,723
What's that, buddy?

37
00:01:29,757 --> 00:01:32,360
It doesn't get any sadder?

38
00:01:34,328 --> 00:01:36,364
(Peter Bjorn and John)
* Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh

39
00:01:36,397 --> 00:01:38,166
[cash register bell dings]

40
00:01:38,199 --> 00:01:43,271
* Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh
ooh ooh *

41
00:01:48,809 --> 00:01:50,711
Well, well, well, Caroline,

42
00:01:50,744 --> 00:01:55,183
I didn't know it was "bring
your boyfriend to work" day.

43
00:01:55,216 --> 00:01:58,386
Even our shower head
is broke, Earl.

44
00:01:58,419 --> 00:02:00,588
We got blasted
with rusty water

45
00:02:00,621 --> 00:02:03,724
and something thick.

46
00:02:03,757 --> 00:02:05,259
Ugh, oh.

47
00:02:05,293 --> 00:02:06,627
I feel so dirty.

48
00:02:06,660 --> 00:02:09,297
Stop. We showered
at Sophie and Oleg's.

49
00:02:09,330 --> 00:02:12,333
That's why I feel dirty.

50
00:02:12,366 --> 00:02:14,168
There was a rubber ducky
in there who looked like

51
00:02:14,202 --> 00:02:17,805
he'd seen
some really messed up stuff.

52
00:02:17,838 --> 00:02:19,873
Look, we will do
what we always do

53
00:02:19,907 --> 00:02:23,177
when we need a new appliance
or a fishnet body stocking.

54
00:02:23,211 --> 00:02:25,179
We'll ask Oleg.
[bell rings]

55
00:02:25,213 --> 00:02:28,782
Did somebody say
fishnet body stocking?

56
00:02:28,816 --> 00:02:31,319
Hey, everybody!

57
00:02:34,222 --> 00:02:35,923
I'm going green,

58
00:02:35,956 --> 00:02:38,692
and I don't just mean
my eye shadow.

59
00:02:38,726 --> 00:02:42,796
Yup, I'm getting my body ready
for pregnancy

60
00:02:42,830 --> 00:02:47,635
with healthy eating
and less smoked meats.

61
00:02:47,668 --> 00:02:51,239
I think going green is more
about the environment, Sophie.

62
00:02:51,272 --> 00:02:52,540
Oh, yeah?

63
00:02:52,573 --> 00:02:56,277
And how many babies
have you had, Caroline?

64
00:02:56,310 --> 00:02:58,812
Sophie,
I wish I were that fetus.

65
00:02:58,846 --> 00:02:59,980
I'm jealous of anything that

66
00:03:00,013 --> 00:03:04,685
gets to be inside you
for nine months.

67
00:03:04,718 --> 00:03:07,588
You know, Oleg, since Sophie's
doing a food cleanse,

68
00:03:07,621 --> 00:03:10,358
maybe you could do a cleanse
for your potty mouth.

69
00:03:10,391 --> 00:03:11,759
I like that idea.

70
00:03:11,792 --> 00:03:14,795
Since I'm changing for a baby,
you should too.

71
00:03:14,828 --> 00:03:18,699
From now on, everything you say
should be G-rated.

72
00:03:18,732 --> 00:03:22,570
Yeah, but the G
doesn't stand for 'gina.

73
00:03:23,937 --> 00:03:28,509
So I'm supposed to serve
bone-in rib eye and pulled pork

74
00:03:28,542 --> 00:03:32,746
and not make any comparison
to my junk?

75
00:03:32,780 --> 00:03:36,817
Well, I'll be over here
eating healthy in my booth.

76
00:03:38,452 --> 00:03:41,955
Max, what are we gonna do
without a working shower?

77
00:03:41,989 --> 00:03:44,892
Where will I cry?

78
00:03:44,925 --> 00:03:48,296
And where will
I hide from you?

79
00:03:48,329 --> 00:03:49,997
Girls, if you need a shower,

80
00:03:50,030 --> 00:03:52,500
there are wonderful facilities
at my new gym.

81
00:03:52,533 --> 00:03:55,569
Well, they obviously
have child care.

82
00:03:55,603 --> 00:03:58,739
They even give me a 6:15
wake-up call every morning,

83
00:03:58,772 --> 00:04:02,376
so I can make it
to my ideal body workout.

84
00:04:02,410 --> 00:04:04,345
I'll give you
a wake-up call right now.

85
00:04:04,378 --> 00:04:06,480
Sleep in.

86
00:04:06,514 --> 00:04:09,583
With that body,
nothing's gonna work out.

87
00:04:09,617 --> 00:04:13,454
Well, I have two "friends
and family" one-day passes

88
00:04:13,487 --> 00:04:15,656
that I've been saving
for my parents' trip,

89
00:04:15,689 --> 00:04:18,025
but last month
they littered in Korea,

90
00:04:18,058 --> 00:04:20,494
so they're in jail.

91
00:04:20,528 --> 00:04:23,030
Hey, I found
something green on here.

92
00:04:23,063 --> 00:04:26,700
Two pistachio ice creams,
please.

93
00:04:26,734 --> 00:04:27,568
Sophie, I'm not sure I--

94
00:04:27,601 --> 00:04:30,704
Just bring me something green,
bitch.

95
00:04:30,738 --> 00:04:33,707
[rock music]

96
00:04:33,741 --> 00:04:35,676
*

97
00:04:35,709 --> 00:04:37,511
[exhaling sharply]

98
00:04:37,545 --> 00:04:39,380
Max, are you in here?

99
00:04:39,413 --> 00:04:41,048
Ah, only lady here

100
00:04:41,081 --> 00:04:44,385
has been in the shower
a long time.

101
00:04:44,418 --> 00:04:46,387
This isn't yours, is it?

102
00:04:46,420 --> 00:04:49,089
Nope, and I'm guessing
it's not yours either.

103
00:04:49,122 --> 00:04:52,893
It is now.

104
00:04:52,926 --> 00:04:54,595
Girl,

105
00:04:54,628 --> 00:04:57,798
why didn't you tell me
a shower could be this good?

106
00:04:57,831 --> 00:04:59,600
I didn't think
you'd believe me,

107
00:04:59,633 --> 00:05:03,036
like when I told you they make
hangers just for pants.

108
00:05:03,070 --> 00:05:05,339
Have you been in there
this whole time?

109
00:05:05,373 --> 00:05:07,808
I got out to pee
a couple times.

110
00:05:07,841 --> 00:05:11,479
Then I didn't get out
to pee a couple times.

111
00:05:11,512 --> 00:05:13,814
While you were meeting water
for the first time,

112
00:05:13,847 --> 00:05:15,549
I took three classes:

113
00:05:15,583 --> 00:05:17,685
Body Rocket with Papo,

114
00:05:17,718 --> 00:05:20,788
Flex Flow with Nat,
and Ab Attack with Abby,

115
00:05:20,821 --> 00:05:26,126
and I just signed up for Celtic
Hip-Hop with Devandre O'Brien.

116
00:05:26,159 --> 00:05:29,997
Yo, can you fit these bad boys
in your purse?

117
00:05:30,030 --> 00:05:33,634
And, uh, don't forget
my new hat.

118
00:05:33,667 --> 00:05:37,438
I'll make room for them
next to the hand towels.

119
00:05:37,471 --> 00:05:38,706
[combination pad beeping]

120
00:05:40,874 --> 00:05:44,144
Ah, good for you, mami.

121
00:05:44,177 --> 00:05:45,613
So I said to my nanny,

122
00:05:45,646 --> 00:05:47,615
"Just take her
to the emergency room.

123
00:05:47,648 --> 00:05:49,650
"I cannot miss my workout
with Brian

124
00:05:49,683 --> 00:05:51,719
because Harlow ate
a jar of Play-Doh."

125
00:05:51,752 --> 00:05:52,720
[scoffs]

126
00:05:52,753 --> 00:05:57,090
FYI, bottomless shaving cream
in the shower.

127
00:05:57,124 --> 00:06:01,595
Gave myself a Santa beard.

128
00:06:01,629 --> 00:06:04,465
Hi, I wasn't listening in--
all this tile,

129
00:06:04,498 --> 00:06:06,667
your voices really carry.

130
00:06:06,700 --> 00:06:08,602
Who's Brian,
and what's this amazing class

131
00:06:08,636 --> 00:06:09,937
you're talking about?

132
00:06:09,970 --> 00:06:11,839
YBBBB with Brian.

133
00:06:11,872 --> 00:06:14,775
Yoga Booty Ballet Boxing
and Beyond,

134
00:06:14,808 --> 00:06:17,077
and it's beyond.

135
00:06:17,110 --> 00:06:18,846
What studio is it in?

136
00:06:18,879 --> 00:06:20,013
I'll go. Max?

137
00:06:20,047 --> 00:06:23,016
There's no Max here!

138
00:06:23,050 --> 00:06:25,152
[rock music]

139
00:06:25,185 --> 00:06:29,089
[machine whirring]

140
00:06:29,122 --> 00:06:32,025
One Ab Blast Immune Boost
with banana.

141
00:06:32,059 --> 00:06:33,461
Anyone else?

142
00:06:33,494 --> 00:06:35,763
Excuse me.

143
00:06:35,796 --> 00:06:37,431
Excuse me.

144
00:06:37,465 --> 00:06:40,400
Can a brother get
some bee pollen?

145
00:06:41,669 --> 00:06:42,970
Thank you, Brian.

146
00:06:43,003 --> 00:06:44,204
Are you sure you haven't taken

147
00:06:44,237 --> 00:06:46,640
Yoga Booty Ballet Boxing
and Beyond before?

148
00:06:46,674 --> 00:06:48,642
'Cause it's like your booty
just instinctively knew

149
00:06:48,676 --> 00:06:49,777
how to go beyond.

150
00:06:49,810 --> 00:06:51,712
[chuckles]

151
00:06:51,745 --> 00:06:54,782
Oh, hello, Caroline,
and you're Brian.

152
00:06:54,815 --> 00:06:57,551
I've seen your trainer photo
on the wall.

153
00:06:57,585 --> 00:07:00,454
I guess it wasn't retouched
as I assumed.

154
00:07:03,957 --> 00:07:05,593
Brian, wait up.

155
00:07:05,626 --> 00:07:09,096
Did you forget we're doing
30 days of sweaty selfies?

156
00:07:09,129 --> 00:07:10,197
Can I buy you a juice?

157
00:07:10,230 --> 00:07:12,466
And make out with you?

158
00:07:12,500 --> 00:07:15,235
Joke, I'm kinda married.

159
00:07:15,268 --> 00:07:16,704
Yeah.
[chuckles]

160
00:07:16,737 --> 00:07:19,006
Caroline, how about
I create a juice for you

161
00:07:19,039 --> 00:07:21,542
that will optimize your workout?

162
00:07:21,575 --> 00:07:23,176
Has he ever bought us a juice?

163
00:07:23,210 --> 00:07:25,946
No, and we bought him a car.

164
00:07:27,247 --> 00:07:30,951
Schiller, dude,
give me a life boost.

165
00:07:30,984 --> 00:07:33,954
Schiller, I'll have
the life boost as well.

166
00:07:33,987 --> 00:07:34,755
Schiller.

167
00:07:34,788 --> 00:07:37,725
Am I saying that right?
Schiller.

168
00:07:37,758 --> 00:07:39,226
Will you be in class tomorrow?

169
00:07:39,259 --> 00:07:40,694
I'd love to see
your flying lotus.

170
00:07:40,728 --> 00:07:42,730
[chuckles]
My lotus only has

171
00:07:42,763 --> 00:07:44,832
a one-day pass,
and it doesn't fly,

172
00:07:44,865 --> 00:07:47,034
it takes the bus.

173
00:07:47,067 --> 00:07:48,502
Not anymore.

174
00:07:48,536 --> 00:07:50,971
I got us jobs at the juice bar.

175
00:07:51,004 --> 00:07:53,874
We can take all the classes
and showers we want.

176
00:07:53,907 --> 00:07:55,776
I told them
I had juicing experience--

177
00:07:55,809 --> 00:07:59,613
not a lie if you count the week
I dated Lance Armstrong.

178
00:08:03,851 --> 00:08:05,586
Earl, this one shower,

179
00:08:05,619 --> 00:08:08,188
the water comes at you
from every angle,

180
00:08:08,221 --> 00:08:11,859
and not because sewage
is backing up.

181
00:08:11,892 --> 00:08:14,127
You do seem happier, Max.

182
00:08:14,161 --> 00:08:16,163
You're even kinda smiling.

183
00:08:16,196 --> 00:08:19,967
How high are you right now?

184
00:08:20,000 --> 00:08:22,670
No, I am totally clean.

185
00:08:22,703 --> 00:08:23,937
Literally.

186
00:08:23,971 --> 00:08:27,140
Showered Max is
a pleasure to be around.

187
00:08:27,174 --> 00:08:31,011
Also, she's much less itchy.

188
00:08:31,044 --> 00:08:34,014
Hello, I'm a member
of Physique Total Body.

189
00:08:34,047 --> 00:08:36,817
Swipe, swipe, swipe.

190
00:08:36,850 --> 00:08:41,755
I love belonging to a place
where not everyone's allowed.

191
00:08:41,789 --> 00:08:43,190
Hey, everybody!

192
00:08:43,223 --> 00:08:46,827
No, it's not fitness nut
Jane Fonda.

193
00:08:46,860 --> 00:08:48,796
It's Sophie Kuchenski!

194
00:08:48,829 --> 00:08:54,134
Yep, and everything about me
is healthy and green.

195
00:08:54,167 --> 00:08:55,636
Hey, Sophie,
since you're being green,

196
00:08:55,669 --> 00:08:57,938
we brought you
a Green Genie from our gym.

197
00:08:57,971 --> 00:09:01,909
Oh, you did?

198
00:09:01,942 --> 00:09:03,777
Ah.

199
00:09:03,811 --> 00:09:07,180
Uh, thanks a lot, Caroline.

200
00:09:07,214 --> 00:09:08,649
We don't really know
what's in it.

201
00:09:08,682 --> 00:09:11,652
We're not good
at our jobs there either.

202
00:09:11,685 --> 00:09:15,155
Aw, look at that.
I'm really proud of her, girls.

203
00:09:15,188 --> 00:09:19,292
Suck it down, baby,
but not in a sexual way.

204
00:09:26,133 --> 00:09:29,069
This is delicious.

205
00:09:29,102 --> 00:09:32,572
I love it, yeah.

206
00:09:33,974 --> 00:09:36,143
Ah. Oh.

207
00:09:39,112 --> 00:09:41,949
I love this drink so much,

208
00:09:41,982 --> 00:09:43,951
I'm gonna take it
to the bathroom,

209
00:09:43,984 --> 00:09:46,654
and I'm gonna love it
in there.

210
00:09:51,859 --> 00:09:53,026
[gasps]

211
00:09:53,060 --> 00:09:56,063
Don't touch anything.

212
00:09:56,096 --> 00:09:59,232
Hey, look.
It's the Oldsen twins.

213
00:09:59,266 --> 00:10:01,101
Did you tell them
we worked here?

214
00:10:01,134 --> 00:10:02,936
My diner uniform
fell out of my gym bag,

215
00:10:02,970 --> 00:10:07,007
and they didn't believe I was
a stewardess on Air Yugoslavia.

216
00:10:08,709 --> 00:10:10,110
Hey, gym buddies.

217
00:10:10,143 --> 00:10:11,779
Oh, we don't need to order.

218
00:10:11,812 --> 00:10:14,381
We don't eat.

219
00:10:14,414 --> 00:10:16,884
Well, you've come
to the right place.

220
00:10:16,917 --> 00:10:19,953
And thanks again for turning me
on to Brian's class.

221
00:10:19,987 --> 00:10:23,791
I'm glad you like it,
but...Jodie?

222
00:10:23,824 --> 00:10:27,728
Yeah, you can't
take it anymore.

223
00:10:27,761 --> 00:10:31,331
So...yeah.

224
00:10:31,364 --> 00:10:32,733
Why not?

225
00:10:32,766 --> 00:10:34,101
Brian likes you,

226
00:10:34,134 --> 00:10:36,937
which we totally
don't understand,

227
00:10:36,970 --> 00:10:39,239
but...Jodes?

228
00:10:39,272 --> 00:10:41,074
Yeah.

229
00:10:41,108 --> 00:10:44,111
We don't want
to share him.

230
00:10:44,144 --> 00:10:47,214
He's all we have.

231
00:10:47,247 --> 00:10:48,882
So...

232
00:10:48,916 --> 00:10:51,184
yeah.

233
00:10:51,218 --> 00:10:53,053
You two are married
with children.

234
00:10:53,086 --> 00:10:57,290
Exactly.
Brian is all we have.

235
00:10:57,324 --> 00:10:59,727
We can make it
really uncomfortable

236
00:10:59,760 --> 00:11:00,794
for you at the gym,

237
00:11:00,828 --> 00:11:02,796
and people are already talking

238
00:11:02,830 --> 00:11:04,898
about your discount yoga pants.

239
00:11:04,932 --> 00:11:08,035
So...yeah.
[scoffs]

240
00:11:09,937 --> 00:11:13,073
Oh, you're not the only person
in here who can be threatening.

241
00:11:13,106 --> 00:11:15,943
Let me go get
my threatening friend.

242
00:11:15,976 --> 00:11:19,112
Max. Max, go over there
and give them the dagger eyes.

243
00:11:19,146 --> 00:11:21,448
You know, the ones
that gave Han the twitch.

244
00:11:21,481 --> 00:11:23,416
This one?

245
00:11:31,792 --> 00:11:33,761
Uh, what is that?

246
00:11:33,794 --> 00:11:34,962
No.

247
00:11:34,995 --> 00:11:36,096
That's like a smile.

248
00:11:36,129 --> 00:11:38,165
You don't smile.
Cut it out.

249
00:11:38,198 --> 00:11:39,933
Max, hurry, give them the face.

250
00:11:39,967 --> 00:11:42,102
Hey, ladies, look.

251
00:11:49,409 --> 00:11:52,345
We don't know what that means.

252
00:11:52,379 --> 00:11:55,248
So...yeah.
[chuckles]

253
00:11:56,383 --> 00:11:57,885
What?
I'm trying,

254
00:11:57,918 --> 00:12:02,122
but I guess showered Max
doesn't have it in her.

255
00:12:02,155 --> 00:12:04,992
Oh...you know,
I'll say this, girls,

256
00:12:05,025 --> 00:12:07,294
but don't quote me.

257
00:12:07,327 --> 00:12:11,832
It ain't easy being green.

258
00:12:11,865 --> 00:12:13,533
I got--[groans]

259
00:12:13,566 --> 00:12:17,270
[rock music]

260
00:12:17,304 --> 00:12:19,773
[juicer buzzing]
Now where's ginger?

261
00:12:19,807 --> 00:12:21,041
Where's ginger?

262
00:12:21,074 --> 00:12:22,309
I don't know, on that island

263
00:12:22,342 --> 00:12:25,278
with Gilligan and the others?

264
00:12:25,312 --> 00:12:27,147
And where's
her Slim Down Smoothie?

265
00:12:27,180 --> 00:12:29,482
In the blender.
Can you finish it?

266
00:12:29,516 --> 00:12:31,852
This wheatgrass smell
makes me sick.

267
00:12:31,885 --> 00:12:37,524
Well, man up. I'm balls deep
in three gut busters over here.

268
00:12:37,557 --> 00:12:38,558
Oh, God.

269
00:12:38,591 --> 00:12:43,196
It smells like the
Jolly Green Giant's jock strap.

270
00:12:43,230 --> 00:12:45,799
Oh, my God, it's like--
[gags]

271
00:12:45,833 --> 00:12:47,300
[gags]

272
00:12:47,334 --> 00:12:51,238
Stop.
You gagging makes me gag.

273
00:12:51,271 --> 00:12:53,907
Okay, almost done.

274
00:12:53,941 --> 00:12:55,809
- [gags]
- [gags]

275
00:12:55,843 --> 00:12:58,045
- [gags]
- [gags]

276
00:12:58,078 --> 00:13:00,881
[both gag]

277
00:13:00,914 --> 00:13:03,283
Slim Down Smoothie!

278
00:13:05,953 --> 00:13:07,287
Kinda got away from me.

279
00:13:07,320 --> 00:13:09,990
I won't charge you
for the extra.

280
00:13:10,023 --> 00:13:12,159
Um, I wanted banana in this.

281
00:13:12,192 --> 00:13:14,294
Max, banana.

282
00:13:16,429 --> 00:13:19,532
You wanted a banana.
Banana.

283
00:13:19,566 --> 00:13:21,902
Ugh. Where is Schiller
to relieve me?

284
00:13:21,935 --> 00:13:24,004
It's time for my YBBB class.

285
00:13:24,037 --> 00:13:25,138
He probably
got his hair caught

286
00:13:25,172 --> 00:13:27,174
in the ab crunch machine again.

287
00:13:27,207 --> 00:13:30,343
That damn crunch machine.

288
00:13:30,377 --> 00:13:31,578
Okay, he's here.
I'm out.

289
00:13:31,611 --> 00:13:34,247
[stammers]
After class, you relieve me.

290
00:13:34,281 --> 00:13:35,382
No dillydallying.

291
00:13:35,415 --> 00:13:37,284
I got a hazard cone
holding the shower

292
00:13:37,317 --> 00:13:39,887
with the railing
and the bench in it.

293
00:13:41,354 --> 00:13:43,323
Ooh, nice earrings, Raquel.

294
00:13:43,356 --> 00:13:46,426
Oh, PavГ© diamonds.
[chuckles]

295
00:13:46,459 --> 00:13:48,161
Found them in a locker.

296
00:13:48,195 --> 00:13:50,998
She doesn't need 'em.

297
00:13:51,031 --> 00:13:52,933
Oh, you want this?

298
00:13:52,966 --> 00:13:54,868
It's a fitness band.

299
00:13:54,902 --> 00:13:56,103
Found it on the floor...

300
00:13:56,136 --> 00:13:58,972
of a locker.

301
00:13:59,006 --> 00:14:00,540
- Thanks.
- Mm.

302
00:14:00,573 --> 00:14:04,945
The only band that's ever been
on me was They Might Be Giants.

303
00:14:04,978 --> 00:14:08,015
Huh. They were not.

304
00:14:08,048 --> 00:14:10,483
Hey, mami, I just heard
those two rich moms

305
00:14:10,517 --> 00:14:12,019
trash-talking your friend.

306
00:14:12,052 --> 00:14:14,487
Tell her to stay clear
of Brian's class.

307
00:14:14,521 --> 00:14:17,090
Their husbands are
silent partners in the gym,

308
00:14:17,124 --> 00:14:19,292
and also, in their marriages.

309
00:14:19,326 --> 00:14:23,163
Wait, are you telling me
I could lose my shower?

310
00:14:23,196 --> 00:14:24,397
And your juice bar jobs.

311
00:14:24,431 --> 00:14:25,966
Oh, right,
that whole thing too.

312
00:14:25,999 --> 00:14:27,500
I gotta stop her.

313
00:14:27,534 --> 00:14:29,336
Feel that nice long stretch.

314
00:14:29,369 --> 00:14:30,904
[Zen music playing]

315
00:14:30,938 --> 00:14:31,972
Can I help you?

316
00:14:32,005 --> 00:14:36,476
Uh...someone reported
a dangerous, wet mess in here.

317
00:14:36,509 --> 00:14:38,611
I don't see a wet mess.

318
00:14:40,647 --> 00:14:43,383
Then you're not looking
right here.

319
00:14:43,416 --> 00:14:46,519
Go away.
You're interrupting my flow.

320
00:14:46,553 --> 00:14:49,189
Good, now try and hold it.
That's right, Caroline.

321
00:14:49,222 --> 00:14:51,324
Okay, you feel that?

322
00:14:51,358 --> 00:14:53,660
Let's get a nice big stretch.

323
00:14:53,693 --> 00:14:55,996
That's big enough.

324
00:14:56,029 --> 00:15:00,233
Miss, we're in the middle
of a class.

325
00:15:00,267 --> 00:15:03,070
And now let's all go
into child's pose.

326
00:15:03,103 --> 00:15:05,973
*

327
00:15:06,006 --> 00:15:08,341
- Hey.
- Max.

328
00:15:08,375 --> 00:15:10,277
You have got to get
out of this class.

329
00:15:10,310 --> 00:15:11,644
Those moms are
looking at you

330
00:15:11,678 --> 00:15:16,316
like you put dressing
on their salad and mixed it in.

331
00:15:16,349 --> 00:15:20,253
Very good.
Your hips are remarkably open.

332
00:15:20,287 --> 00:15:22,956
Thank you, Brian.

333
00:15:22,990 --> 00:15:24,691
I can't lose that shower.

334
00:15:24,724 --> 00:15:27,060
I finally found something
to make me feel good

335
00:15:27,094 --> 00:15:28,561
that doesn't end in "arijuana."

336
00:15:28,595 --> 00:15:31,298
Miss, you're stopping
our flow.

337
00:15:31,331 --> 00:15:34,601
That's exactly
what I said, Brian.

338
00:15:34,634 --> 00:15:37,237
YBBBB is a moving meditation,

339
00:15:37,270 --> 00:15:39,172
so move it on out of here.

340
00:15:39,206 --> 00:15:43,243
Why you gotta BBBB so rude?

341
00:15:43,276 --> 00:15:45,478
Namaste.

342
00:15:45,512 --> 00:15:50,217
And, you,
Namaste away from him.

343
00:15:50,250 --> 00:15:51,451
[rock music]

344
00:15:56,189 --> 00:15:59,192
I'm back.
See? Nothing happened.

345
00:15:59,226 --> 00:16:01,094
Those two moms
didn't do anything.

346
00:16:01,128 --> 00:16:03,030
I mean, how dangerous
can they be?

347
00:16:03,063 --> 00:16:06,233
They're almost 40.

348
00:16:06,266 --> 00:16:10,637
40?
That's almost 50.

349
00:16:10,670 --> 00:16:12,739
Great class.

350
00:16:12,772 --> 00:16:15,275
I felt quite the burn.

351
00:16:15,308 --> 00:16:18,545
How about I buy you ladies each
a Sex on the Peach?

352
00:16:18,578 --> 00:16:20,747
Great, just not from her.

353
00:16:20,780 --> 00:16:22,115
[whispers inaudibly]

354
00:16:22,149 --> 00:16:24,751
[all laugh]

355
00:16:24,784 --> 00:16:26,486
Han, what's so funny?

356
00:16:26,519 --> 00:16:31,091
Caroline, rumor has it
you let one fly in yoga class.

357
00:16:31,124 --> 00:16:33,460
[all laugh]

358
00:16:33,493 --> 00:16:35,528
Max, what's Han saying?

359
00:16:35,562 --> 00:16:40,667
You tooted.
Floated an air biscuit.

360
00:16:40,700 --> 00:16:42,135
Pass-ah the gas-ah.

361
00:16:42,169 --> 00:16:43,770
[all laugh]

362
00:16:43,803 --> 00:16:45,405
Still need me to clarify?

363
00:16:45,438 --> 00:16:47,640
Okay, hi, um, to be clear,

364
00:16:47,674 --> 00:16:49,709
I didn't do what they said.
I wouldn't.

365
00:16:49,742 --> 00:16:51,478
If I had, I would have
already thrown myself

366
00:16:51,511 --> 00:16:54,247
down the StairMaster.

367
00:16:54,281 --> 00:16:55,782
You mess with the bull,

368
00:16:55,815 --> 00:16:59,452
you get the fart rumor.

369
00:16:59,486 --> 00:17:03,556
Oh, my God,
those 60-year-old women

370
00:17:03,590 --> 00:17:06,226
started a fart rumor about me.

371
00:17:06,259 --> 00:17:08,261
At least they didn't
get us fired.

372
00:17:08,295 --> 00:17:12,232
Ah, phew.
Ha, no pun intended.

373
00:17:12,265 --> 00:17:13,633
Hey, Brian, great class.

374
00:17:13,666 --> 00:17:15,368
Wanna design a juice for me?

375
00:17:15,402 --> 00:17:16,669
Kinda busy right now.

376
00:17:16,703 --> 00:17:18,338
I got a recently divorced dad
looking to

377
00:17:18,371 --> 00:17:20,340
get back out there
in a big way.

378
00:17:20,373 --> 00:17:22,375
Plus, you farted.

379
00:17:24,811 --> 00:17:26,713
I can't believe
this is happening.

380
00:17:26,746 --> 00:17:29,449
I'm being shunned in public
for something I didn't do.

381
00:17:29,482 --> 00:17:32,419
It's my father's Ponzi scheme
all over again.

382
00:17:32,452 --> 00:17:36,556
From now on, I'm Caroline,
the gas-ah pass-ah.

383
00:17:36,589 --> 00:17:41,128
Look, I know
you're in a fart spiral,

384
00:17:41,161 --> 00:17:42,795
but their husbands
own this place,

385
00:17:42,829 --> 00:17:45,765
so don't do anything to ruin
this sweet situation for us.

386
00:17:45,798 --> 00:17:48,668
Sorry, Max, but I never told
off those Upper East Side ladies

387
00:17:48,701 --> 00:17:50,537
for how they treated me
five years ago,

388
00:17:50,570 --> 00:17:53,573
so I'm gonna have to let
these two rich bitches have it.

389
00:17:53,606 --> 00:17:54,674
Oh, no.

390
00:17:54,707 --> 00:17:56,609
Just because you're
in sad, loveless marriages...

391
00:17:56,643 --> 00:17:59,746
[machines buzzing
over Caroline's voice]

392
00:18:20,233 --> 00:18:21,634
[machines winding down]

393
00:18:24,504 --> 00:18:26,739
We couldn't even hear you,

394
00:18:26,773 --> 00:18:29,509
so...yeah.

395
00:18:29,542 --> 00:18:31,244
I'll be happy
to repeat every word.

396
00:18:31,278 --> 00:18:32,812
Oh, man.

397
00:18:32,845 --> 00:18:34,814
[machine whirring]

398
00:18:34,847 --> 00:18:37,484
[machine grinding]

399
00:18:38,418 --> 00:18:40,620
My fitness band slid off!

400
00:18:40,653 --> 00:18:43,223
I broke the Mega Juicer 5000.

401
00:18:43,256 --> 00:18:45,558
You know why they call it
a Mega Juicer 5000?

402
00:18:45,592 --> 00:18:47,560
'Cause it costs 5000.

403
00:18:47,594 --> 00:18:51,898
We know.
We bought one for Brian.

404
00:18:51,931 --> 00:18:54,667
I think
you just got fired, mami.

405
00:18:54,701 --> 00:18:57,504
Oh, here's a good-bye gift.

406
00:18:57,537 --> 00:18:59,772
Another fitness band.

407
00:18:59,806 --> 00:19:02,709
Raquel, will you tell
the shower with the bench

408
00:19:02,742 --> 00:19:04,377
that I love him?

409
00:19:04,411 --> 00:19:07,380
[rock music]

410
00:19:07,414 --> 00:19:08,515
*

411
00:19:08,548 --> 00:19:10,383
[banging on pipe]

412
00:19:10,417 --> 00:19:11,551
[ratcheting]

413
00:19:11,584 --> 00:19:13,953
Oleg, how's it going in there?

414
00:19:13,986 --> 00:19:15,655
I'm ready to screw it in.

415
00:19:15,688 --> 00:19:19,192
Said with zero sexual innuendo.

416
00:19:19,226 --> 00:19:21,294
Here. How lucky are we
that Raquel found

417
00:19:21,328 --> 00:19:23,696
this shower head in the locker?

418
00:19:23,730 --> 00:19:27,967
I burned 515 calories
walking home.

419
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:30,403
Oh, that's the time.

420
00:19:30,437 --> 00:19:32,305
Still, nothing to sneeze at.

421
00:19:32,339 --> 00:19:33,740
Who needs a fancy gym?

422
00:19:33,773 --> 00:19:36,209
Oleg's here right now
to take care of our hole.

423
00:19:36,243 --> 00:19:39,312
Okay, now you're doing it
on purpose.

424
00:19:39,346 --> 00:19:41,981
[knocks on door]

425
00:19:42,014 --> 00:19:46,453
Anybody wanna go grab
a lettuce wedge at Wedgies?

426
00:19:47,720 --> 00:19:50,657
There she is,
my vegan vixen.

427
00:19:50,690 --> 00:19:52,425
Just look
at that healthy glow.

428
00:19:52,459 --> 00:19:53,960
- Mmm.
- [giggling]

429
00:19:53,993 --> 00:19:55,428
Mmm.

430
00:19:57,964 --> 00:19:59,432
Sugar.

431
00:19:59,466 --> 00:20:03,002
That's not a glow.
It's a glaze.

432
00:20:03,035 --> 00:20:04,604
I had a doughnut.

433
00:20:04,637 --> 00:20:06,673
Yeah, it fell on my face.

434
00:20:06,706 --> 00:20:10,377
I had to eat it,
or I would suffocate to death.

435
00:20:10,410 --> 00:20:11,911
I've been on my best behavior,

436
00:20:11,944 --> 00:20:13,846
and you're not
holding up your end,

437
00:20:13,880 --> 00:20:16,316
which, for some
godforsaken reason,

438
00:20:16,349 --> 00:20:19,586
I'm not even allowed
to comment on!

439
00:20:19,619 --> 00:20:23,390
Oh, maybe we could
have a cheat day,

440
00:20:23,423 --> 00:20:26,025
and that day could be...

441
00:20:26,058 --> 00:20:29,429
today?

442
00:20:29,462 --> 00:20:33,466
Pound cake?
Know what I'd like to pound?

443
00:20:33,500 --> 00:20:37,003
Oh, I sure do.

444
00:20:37,036 --> 00:20:38,571
Mmm.

445
00:20:38,605 --> 00:20:40,607
What are we waiting for?

446
00:20:40,640 --> 00:20:43,743
[both moaning]

447
00:20:44,911 --> 00:20:46,045
- [gags]
- [gags]

448
00:20:46,078 --> 00:20:47,347
- [gags]
- [gags]

449
00:20:47,380 --> 00:20:48,681
[horse gags]

450
00:20:48,715 --> 00:20:49,982
- [gags]
- [gags]

451
00:20:50,016 --> 00:20:53,453
[rock music]

452
00:20:53,486 --> 00:20:55,888
[cash register bell dings]

453
00:20:57,056 --> 00:21:00,026
[rock music]

454
00:21:00,059 --> 00:21:08,034
*